Monday, July 9, 2018

Revolution Chapter 2

Chapter 2
The Start of Sukey


Kutsankhamon sat in the driveway, looking cute so someone would pick him up. [Note--it's looking like I consistently "misspelled" King Kuts's name--likely as "Kutsankamon"--but I long ago erased and fixed it at each occurrence.] A [sic] the sight of a camel trodding [sic] in with a horse at it's [sic] side, he sniffled miserably.

The camel stopped and someone, a German Shepherd, came over and picked him up. Then, he stopped and picked up the wolf.

"What are you doing out in the mud?" he said. "You could catch cold, you know."

Kutsankhamon shook a muddy paw.

The dog went up to the door and knocked. Imhoptep [sic], Thutmose's brother, answered. [Note--eh, oops! I forgot THAT one! In my plotline, Imhotep--whose name is consistently misspelled as "Imhoptep"--and Thutmose III are twin brothers. You ARE aware that Zoser, with Imhotep as his vizier, ruled hundreds of years BEFORE Thutmose III, who as far as I know was in no way related to either, right...? Well, not in my stories. I'll stop marking his name as misspelled after this.]

"Oh, hi, Zoser," he said, letting him in. "The pyramid plans are great." [Note--this is likely in reference to the Step Pyramid--which Imhotep designed for Zoser (Imhotep was an architect).]

Zoser sighed. "Did you get news of the war?" he said.

"This is so cool!" a female voice from the dining room exclaimed.

"What's with Hattie?" Zoser said.

"She thinks war is a great idea."

Zoser looked at Hatshepsut. "Geesh [sic], Hattie, anything for excitement, huh?"

Hattie only brushed an ear. Thutmose imitated her, only a bit too girly. Everyone except Hatshepsut laughed.

"I have a neeeew boyfriend an' we're goin' onna blin' date," he said, puckering his lips.

Winnefaru, another German Shepherd, held her head and laughed. [Note--Winnefaru is a fictional creation of mine. She is the future ill-fated wife of Zoser.]

Kutsankhamon babbled.

"Oh, there's a camel out there," Zoser said. "It was running around without an owner."

"Let the puppies see it," Hattie said. "They've never seen a camel before."

"Especially this. It's a bactrian [sic]."

The puppies and baby puppies went outside, with baby Benji, a little greyhound. [Note--yep, THAT Benji, from The Outback Adventure.] As soon as they got out, Benji shrieked, crawled to the camel, and threw his arms around it's [sic] neck. The camel licked him.

"Sukey Sukey Sukey," Benji said.

"Good name," Hatshepsut said.

"We could put the camel away for a while and then give it to him," Imhoptep suggested.

There was a clop, clop, clop. All heads turned and saw a gray horse with another dog on it's [sic] back. The dog stopped the horse and called out, "Got news of a raid from both sides?"

"How can Syrians come from the north and Upper Egyptians from the south?" Akhenaton asked. "The Upper Egyptians are above us, too."

"Not anymore. Most of 'em travelled below us a long time ago," the dog said. [Note--ah, there you go. Knew I had an explanation. I can only assume that in later stories they went back to their fictional and mistaken home in the north! So in this story, the Upper Egyptians would be in...the Sudan??]

Sukey snorted.

The dog surveyed the camel. "Nice camel," he said. Then, "Any one of you gonna fight?"

Everyone turned towards the doorway, where Thutmose had been. All who had gone to his house had seen numerous war relics inside. But Thutmose was gone.

"Boy, he's fast," Hatshepsut remarked.

"Always has been," Imhoptep said. "Sneaky, too."

"I don't know my own nephew enough," Hatshepsut muttered, going inside.

"Oh well," the stranger said. He leaned towards Zoser. "Keep a lookout, Gray," he whispered. "These Syrians are sneaky and so are the Hyksos. [Note--another traditional enemy of the Egyptians. I remember that for a long time I got their name wrong as "Hyskos," but must have corrected myself before this story was written.] They'll burn or trample anything in their way. I've seen some other Lower Egyptians and it's up to you and your friends to save Egypt. Who knows? Soon Rome will be wanting us, and Greece, too. [Note--remember!--I had NO CONCEPT of actual history back then!!] Remember, young Graywolf--" and the horse reared up, "--it's up to you." The horse now galloped off. [Note--oh...duh. The wolf figurine probably has something to do with Zoser then, but I still can't recall it!]

Zoser nodded, perplexed and puzzled about being called 'young Graywolf'. [Note--misplaced period or single quote (which should more appropriately be double quotes).] What in the world did that mean?

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