Return From The River
"HE IS DEAD! And it is YOUR FAULT!"
Charmian stared at Manabozho, stunned into silence. He swept one hand viciously across his eyes, baring his teeth, before whirling away from her and stomping back down the riverbank, the others immediately clearing a path for him. They all watched him go, then turned back to look at Charmian. All but Niskigwun stared at her as if expecting some sort of explanation; her face burned and she had to avert her eyes. She turned away from them and shut her eyes then, biting her lip and trying not to cry out loud. After a moment Niskigwun stepped toward her and stopped by her side.
"The Shadow Wolves," he said to the others. "They circled us...and forced Wabasso down to the river." He paused and then said, "They might still be about...we should go to safety before they return."
"But--what about--" Peepaukawiss glanced at the ice, and bit his lip, cringing. "...You know...?"
Mudjikawiss made a face. "Ice water," he grunted. "He will keep." He turned and started trudging down the river in the same direction that Manabozho had gone in; Puka's eyes filled with tears and he put his hands up to his face and wept. Marten crept atop his shoulder and sat there looking gloomy, occasionally rubbing at his nose.
Charmian sensed Niskigwun looking at her, but couldn't lift her head. It is not your fault, he thought, and that only made her want to cry harder; Wabasso had said much the same words, before... The Michinimakinong seemed to sense that he hadn't made her feel any better, and reluctantly walked away. After a moment Puka managed to drag himself to his feet and follow them, still weeping and holding Marten to his shoulder, and Charmian was left on her own beside the river. For once she didn't care that she was crying; it didn't seem to matter whether she should feel embarrassed or not. As such the tears streamed down her face unheeded, and her shoulders shook, her chest hitching.
It is my fault. If my powers worked...if I hadn't brought them all here...if I'd known ahead of time...if I hadn't come to the Island in the first place...it's just like Ogimah-Quae said, it's all my fault...
She let out a choking noise and lifted one shaky hand to wipe her eyes. A crunch of snow came behind her but she didn't even notice it until she sensed somebody still standing near her, but didn't speak. She couldn't even string words together coherently anymore.
A voice in her head said softly, Charmian...?
The little bit of self-control still keeping her from breaking down snapped then, and she squinched her eyes shut, a flood of tears descending from them. She let out the choked noise again and turned around, wiping at her eyes like a child lost in a supermarket; a second later she was holding onto Moon Wolf, sobbing against his chest as if letting go of him would send her sliding down into the river herself. After a moment he touched her shoulder, and it felt as if her eyes would never run dry.
"I didn't mean it," she cried, her voice breaking. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it..."
Night settled in early over the Fairy Realm, no stars sparkling in the sky because of the clouds, and an even deeper chill seeping through the air. The group set up a small camp a little distance inland from the river, huddling around the fire and staring disconsolately into the flames as they licked feebly at the wood. No one spoke, and Peepaukawiss was the only one who made any noise at all, occasionally whimpering and sniffling to himself as he rubbed his eyes. Manabozho sat some distance away from the fire, his back to it; Niskigwun looked up at him now and then, but said nothing. A good while after the sun had presumably set, the sound of footfalls came from the woods and the Michinimakinong raised his spear, tensing; when he recognized the shape coming toward them he relaxed, but got to his feet anyway. He glanced anxiously at Charmian as Moon Wolf carried her into the clearing.
"She is sleeping," he said quietly; he'd wrapped her in his own fur, and nothing of her showed but her face and her feet, the former still troubled even in sleep. Niskigwun stepped aside and he settled her down by the fire, tucking the fur around her and then sitting down at her side. Niskigwun sat down on her other side, and they resumed staring at the fire.
"The Wendigoes," he murmured after a while. "They still roam about, but they are the least of our worries now. The spirit stone is split and so probably not as powerful, if they can be overcome one by one. I could probably do this myself if need be."
"And the Shadow Wolves?" Moon Wolf prompted. Niskigwun sighed and huddled in on himself. "Something makes me believe they are not supposed to be here."
"They were the guardians of the Island, long ago. Until this Chakenapok seized control of them. Their ogimah-quae is untouched, yet so far she is the only one to ever speak with her." And he nodded at Charmian.
"Your people have no contact with them...?"
Niskigwun shook his head. "It was many years ago...long before I can remember. They grew apart from us, living on their own for so long." He frowned. "Yet for some reason, their ogimah-quae singles her out...why? Why speak through her, and not straight to us?"
"Perhaps you are too close," Moon Wolf said; when Niskigwun looked at him he glanced at Charmian. "The same as the reason why I sought her help. We are all too close to the Island. Sometimes an outsider is the only one who can truly be of use."
The Michinimakinong's brow furrowed. "But, why is this...? The closer one is to this Island..."
"The more difficult it can be to see the problem exactly," Moon Wolf said, just as Charmian began to stir. "Sometimes one must step back to see...and none of us has done that, so far."
Niskigwun sighed and shuffled his wings as Charmian blinked herself awake, slowly sitting upright and rubbing at her eyes, staring at the fire. "Whichever case, even if the Wendigoes are dispelled there are still Shadow Wolves to deal with...and this gets us no closer to Chakenapok himself...it all feels like dead end upon dead end. Even should we take care of both of them, by now it seems he could go after whoever he chooses, just to reach his ends...it would not matter to him who he puts down..."
"It's my fault," Charmian said, still staring at the fire. The others all looked at her, but she didn't look back. Her own eyes looked dead. "If I hadn't brought them all here..."
Niskigwun leaned over and looked into her face. "This is only what he wishes you to think," he said. "You are not to blame for this. Nothing you could do would have changed it."
Puka crawled toward her on hands and knees. "There is no way any of us could hold you responsible for this!" he exclaimed softly. "It wasn't your fault at all!" His eyes began to tear up and his lip quivered. "It was a terrible accident, is what it was...poor 'Basso..."
"It wasn't an accident," Charmian retorted, and they looked at her again. Her eyes grew hard yet wet. "Chakenapok knew I would do this because I'm predictable--I always act the same way. If I hadn't done what I always do, and if I'd tried figuring out what he was up to, instead of fixing on my own stupid plan..." She pushed herself to her feet and dropped Moon Wolf's fur, clenching her fists and biting back her tears as best as she could, though a few did still leak from her eyes. "I'm the reason Wabasso's dead. I should be the one to fix it all."
Niskigwun and Moon Wolf shared a look, then Niskigwun got to his feet. "There is no way you can do this on your own," he said. "There are simply too many of them, and only one of you. And even if you did insist on it, no one here would let you head into it on your own."
"He's right!" Marten exclaimed, tail flicking. "You got everybody this far, everybody can't back down now!"
"I got everybody THIS far!" Charmian snapped, making him jump. "And take a look what happened!" She jerked her hand toward the river; even Mudjikawiss frowned at her now. "I keep trying to fix things, and instead I just keep destroying even more and more!" She turned away from the fire and took a few steps toward the woods, clenching and unclenching her hands and trying to steady herself, though her heart thudded hard and her breath came fast. Her own words rang back in her head and she felt cold on thinking over what she'd just said.
"I'm destroying things..." she murmured, and her vision blurred.
Ocryana...my reflection...
I just keep destroying everything around me...without even thinking...
I've made people afraid of me--the camp--Singing Cedars--Black Elk Horn--and I just keep making things worse...
My reflection...
"I have to go back to the Island," she murmured after a moment, and they looked at her again. She turned slowly around and wiped at her eyes, not meeting theirs. "Ogimah-Quae," she said. "She said I would need her help soon." Her eyes watered up again and her lip trembled. "I think this is...what she meant." She swallowed and said, "I have to go back to the Island. I have to meet somebody there who'll show me the way. I have to try to make it right again."
Moon Wolf's brow furrowed. "By doing what--? If you need all four brothers, and one of them is gone..."
"I don't know what," Charmian said. "All I know is this is the last chance I have." She lifted her head to look at Manabozho, still seated away from the fire with his back to them. "It's the last thing I can do," she whispered.
They all stared at her for a moment, then got to their feet. "You can take the gateway back to the Island," Niskigwun said. "And find this person there."
Moon Wolf looked at him. "What about the...?"
Niskigwun glanced skyward and scowled slightly. "I can stay behind to see to the Wendigoes. I will call up the other Michinimakinong who are about, and we will deal with them ourselves. Once we collect the spirit stones we will destroy them." He looked at Puka and frowned. "You should not stay here. After what happened to Wabasso--"
"I...I suppose I could stay at the Crooked Tree," Puka stammered, wringing his hands. "I should be safe there--right? And--and I haven't been to see Noko in quite a while..."
Niskigwun nodded. "You would be best off there, until such a time as you might be needed; he may still try to reach one of you."
"What about the Shadow Wolves?" Moon Wolf asked.
The snow crunched and an unpleasant voice growled, "Leave them to me." They peered toward the fire to see Mudjikawiss standing there with his bow clasped in one great fist; he scowled, looking ready to snap it in two.
"Piddling little manitous," he muttered. "If they deserve to learn a lesson, then it shall be from me. If I had been the one facing them, and not that weakling Wabasso, they would already be dead by now."
"Do not kill them!" Niskigwun retorted, wings flaring. "Not unless you absolutely must! They are not evil creatures!"
Mudjikawiss snorted. "Tell that to Wabasso," he growled, but turned away and started off through the forest. Puka wrung his hands and stepped toward the edge of the clearing, chewing his lip.
"So...we go back to the gateway?" he asked meekly. "What if they set upon us on the way there...?" And he started chattering.
Marten hopped upon his shoulder again. "I'LL fight them off! They won't know WHAT hit them!" He made faces and flashed his teeth and flicked his tail about like a whip.
"I will accompany you back to the gate," Niskigwun said. He looked at Charmian. "And join you as soon as this matter is dealt with."
Moon Wolf nodded, since Charmian had stopped speaking. They started along the river again, though Charmian stalled and glanced back at the lone figure left in the flickering firelight, and bit her lip. The others paused, noticing her reaction, then moved slowly on ahead. Charmian stood in the snow for a few moments, trying to think of what to say, anything to say, yet unable to come up with anything near the right words. Were there even any right words for this...?
"I'm sorry, Manabozho," she finally called softly, hating how trite and useless it was, and hating herself for even having to say it. She paused, then said, "I'll do everything I can to make it right. I promise."
Manabozho's response was to stand up, turn, and walk away into the woods, and out of her sight. He didn't even glance back; she waited for him to send her some sort of thought, or at least a mental emotion, yet he left nothing behind him. She felt her insides sink, feeling that he did not believe, yet she called after him one last time anyway, so only he could hear.
I mean it, Manabozho. I can't say how sorry I am...but I'll make it up to you. I promise. You know I don't promise unless I mean it. I'll give everything I have. Everything I can. Okay, Manabozho...?
Silence. The only thing to be heard was the slight whisper of wind overhead, and the only feeling to be had was the unending bite of cold, and the heavy fog of despair settling inside her chest. Without another word or thought she turned away from where he had been, and slowly trudged after the others.
The trek back along the river, past the lake, and up the rise toward the field before the Sky Tree seemed to take ages upon ages, in the icy prickle of the cold. The wind moaned through the giant Tree's branches as they crossed the field and Charmian stopped to look at it several times--as did Niskigwun--before the little rise of land where the gateway resided came into sight. None of them talked the entire way there, staring dispiritedly at the snow littering the ground, their footfalls almost the only sound aside from the wind. Peepaukawiss sniffled and wiped at his nose, biting back his whimpers, though the closer they got to the gateway the more difficult this became, until he was finally crying openly, Mudjikawiss scowling and looking as if he wanted to hit him but refraining. Charmian's own face screwed up and she wiped her eyes yet made no other sound. Niskigwun came to a slow stop below the rise to the gateway and turned around to look at her, the others doing likewise; he shuffled his wings meekly, then looked up at the others.
Puka sniffled again, still rubbing his eyes. "I'll go through," he murmured, carrying Marten along up the slope. He had to stop beside the gateway to gather himself, and the sounds that he let out made Charmian's own expression grow even worse; Marten noticed this, hopped down from his shoulder, and grasped one of his fingers in his little hand and led him through so they disappeared from sight. Mudjikawiss snorted and turned.
"I only came this far in case those stupid Wolves showed up again," he muttered. "As far as I am concerned, all of you are on your own for now." He trudged back away toward the trees, glancing around himself as he went.
Niskigwun shuffled his wings again. "Mainlander..." he said, then, "Charmian..." He paused. "What happened was not your fault, you must know this."
Charmian said nothing.
Niskigwun's wings sank and he looked at Moon Wolf as if for help. Moon Wolf seemed to be at a loss for words even as he glanced at her himself.
"You know now this was Chakenapok's plan," he said. "Even if you had not been here, he would have gone through with it somehow. If not Wabasso, then one of the others. You have said it yourself--he was never after you in the first place."
"That's the point," Charmian murmured, rubbing her eyes. "He was after them, and I should've seen it coming."
"Even I did not see it coming," Niskigwun interjected. "And I am supposed to look out for such things! If I did not see it, then how would you expect anyone else to?"
"Because I know him and I should know what he'll do." She lifted her head and gave the Michinimakinong a pleading look. "Can we just go now? I have to get out of here and think. There has to be something I can do."
Niskigwun's wings sank again and he looked as forlorn as a lost puppy, yet he turned to the gateway anyway. Charmian lowered her head and started up the slope after him. Both of the others looked as if they wanted to speak, yet held their tongues as she reached one arm up for the gateway.
An arrow glanced off of the rock just inches away from her fingers, making her jerk back when little splinters of stone flew from the site of the impact. She glanced back in surprise, the others doing likewise, their eyes wide and startled.
A dark shape had formed far across the field below, but already they could make out the features of the mass running toward them. Charmian's eyes widened even further on recognizing the men who had followed them running through the woods, and she sucked in a breath.
"The Iroquois--! They came back--!"
Niskigwun grabbed her elbow and pulled her up. "Go! I told you I would take care of them!" He hauled her toward the stone but she grabbed onto it and refused to go through; Niskigwun grated his teeth and pushed her. "I said I can handle them! If you stay, I will just have to protect YOU, too!"
"The Michinimakinong aren't here!" Charmian protested. "You have to fight them off somehow--!"
He hissed. "You do not have any powers here! Remember?"
A devastated look crossed Charmian's face. Moon Wolf bounded up the slope and once he had reached her, he turned and held up his hand, blue flame surging around his fingers. "Do as he says!" he ordered. "Again your own words! You have to go back to the Island!"
Charmian chewed her lip, but complied, again reaching for the stone arch. Just as she put her hand through, however, it was as if gravity defied her, and she let out a startled yelp and fell backwards, slamming into the ground before tumbling head over heels, Moon Wolf having to grab hold of her arm to keep her from descending to the bottom of the slope. She chattered at the icy gust that retreated, and they all looked back to see the Iroquois grinning at them just like an army of Augwaks, their eyes yellow and their faces sunken and pale. Charmian shuddered at the look of them. It seemed as if they hadn't eaten anything in weeks.
As if to confirm this thought, Niskigwun exclaimed, "The Wendigo spirit stone! It takes them over even more greatly! Hurry up and try to get through and I will hold them off until I can call the others! If they keep these spirit stones for too long, they will become Wendigoes themselves!"
Charmian stretched out her arm, then yanked it back with a hiss. "I--I can't get through--! It's icy cold up there!!" For as soon as her fingers had gotten near the gateway, they had felt like they were going to burn off, the air was so cold. Moon Wolf held his own hand upward and the flames around his fingers immediately blew back like a candle almost being snuffed out. He frowned and turned back.
"They've created some kind of--shield?" He sounded confused, yet held up his hands to try to burn the shield away; Niskigwun leapt down the slope, shouting over his shoulder.
"Forget about it! You have to protect her! If you cannot get through, then run!"
Charmian yelped when the medicine man grabbed her hand and pulled her up and around the gateway. They started to scramble up toward the woods on its other side, only to halt again. Little yellow dots appeared among the trees, and a growling noise filled the air.
Moon Wolf gritted his teeth. "I thought Mudjikawiss was taking care of that!" He headed back for the gateway and paused, glancing around them. The only other safe haven was the Sky Tree, and the only way there was straight through the Iroquois.
Charmian grasped his arm and slunk behind him, then looked back at the approaching Shadow Wolves and slunk back. "If I just had some stupid powers--!"
Moon Wolf's face grew dark, and he pulled her toward the gateway once more when Niskigwun reached the bottom of the slope and went running straight toward the Iroquois. She opened her mouth to yell out at him, just as he leapt into the air, wings spread, and kicked the leader right under the chin, making his head fly back. That was all that she got to see before Moon Wolf yanked on her arm, and the next thing she knew he was trying to burn off the ice shield again.
"Keep beside me and tell me if they come," he ordered.
"The ice is too cold," Charmian chattered, watching his fire ripple in front of the gateway yet do nothing else. He held up both of his hands and repeated the gesture without luck, and she could sense his frustration; he even stopped to look at his hands as if the fault lay there.
"Stupid!" he snapped; Charmian jumped, at first thinking he was talking to her, before realizing that he was berating himself. She bit her lip and shook his arm.
"Let me try! 'Bozho never taught me, but they said all manitous speak the same language! I know I never learned how to ask them here, but maybe if I sound desperate enough--?" A hunk of ice flew at their heads, cracking against the stone, and she yelped and put her arms over her head as Moon Wolf batted the shards away.
"Speaking with manitous requires more than desperation!" he exclaimed.
Charmian cringed at the noises coming from below. "It can't HURT, can it--?!" Before he could answer she thrust her hand out toward the rock, without looking, and cried, "Please please please please MELT MELT MELT! Fire! Water! Melt! SOMETHING!"
An odd noise came, which neither of them could have described even if they'd wanted to; it seemed to emanate from the opposite side of the shield. They had enough time to lift their heads and look at it in confusion before the ice shield gave way, and a frigid gust of wind spilled out from the gateway, knocking them backwards.
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