Every Little Thing He Does
"CHARMIAN--? CHARMIAN, SLOW down!"
Charmian walked briskly again, her snowshoes plowing through the billowing snow. Thomas struggled to catch up with her, batting the stuff aside as it flew at his face. "Charmian--!" he exclaimed, and sputtered when some flew in his mouth. "Charmian! Must you walk so bloody fast--?"
"I didn't even see it," Charmian exclaimed, fists clenched and snowshoes plowing. "It was right in front of me the whole time, and I never even SAW it! I should've seen it!"
Thomas at last caught up with her, and grabbed onto her elbow. She had to slow down to avoid falling over, but she kept walking; he looked down into her face and frowned to see the way she scowled, her eyes glimmering but not spilling over just yet. She seemed more furious than anything.
"What are you even talking about?" he asked.
Charmian jerked her hand toward the wide forest road in front of them. The wind howled in the treetops. "Cave of the Woods!"
Thomas sputtered again. "I rather got that part," he said. "What I don't get is what this has to do with Chakenapok--?"
"A cave with medicine! Noko mentioned a cave with medicine in it!"
"After exploring this place I was rather of the mind that they all have medicine in them--!"
"Which is why it stood out! Not a cave with medicine in it, but a cave with medicine in it!" She gestured again, as if that explained everything. "Moon Wolf!"
Thomas's brow furrowed. "Moon Wolf--? That bloke who kept attacking you--?"
"The last time I was here," Charmian said between gritted teeth, her feet still plowing. "The cave was magic--it was a whole lot deeper than it is now. Back then, I thought that was because of Moon Wolf living in it! But it wasn't his medicine at all--he never used that medicine!" She ground her teeth. "The cave knew he was there! Just like the Road felt me! Chakenapok must've been controlling it." She furiously rubbed at her eyes now, as her eyelashes were frosting together. "HE was the one using medicine! That's how he knew about Moon Wolf--Moon Wolf lived here! That whole winter I trained here--he must've been watching us! He would've seen EVERYTHING!" She started walking fast again, and Thomas picked up his pace as well. "I was so STUPID I didn't even THINK of it until now!"
"And so what is this all about?" Thomas asked. "Chakenapok's upset because he was moved away from his mother--?"
"What little kid wouldn't be? Malsum might be controlling him, but Chakenapok's still the one doing all the reacting. Every single thing he's done, except for killing Wenonah, he's done on his own. That's the one thing that doesn't fit--the one thing Malsum did, on his own." She wiped her eyes again. "And that was the ONE thing he apologized for, when I got through to him. He isn't sorry about anything else. He's angry, and pissed off, and has a chip on his shoulder the size of Lake Michigan. Noko just made it a whole lot worse when she moved his body--he would've headed over the Spirit Road with Wenonah, but instead..." She shrugged helplessly. "He never even made it that far. He got to the Road, but for whatever reason he couldn't make it on his own. So he's stuck somewhere, remembering the last place he knew right after he died!"
"But why is he going after Manabozho for all this? He's not the one who killed him, or moved him..."
Another, angrier shrug. "Remember he's thinking like a little kid! The blame's ALWAYS on the big bad brother! In his head 'Bozho came first, so 'Bozho's the reason everything happened to him the way it did. Plus, Malsum is just following pattern and seeking out the twin who bested him. Underneath this all goes back to Glooskap, but in the end, it's all about why brothers just can't get along. Take a look at how all the normal ones get along! You think Chakenapok's the exception--?"
They pushed their way out into a small clearing surrounded by snow-glutted trees, their boughs sagging precariously. A sliver of black yawned from the sea of white, and they stopped as soon as they recognized Cave of the Woods beneath its heavy mantle of snow. Charmian hesitated only slightly before trudging her way toward it, Thomas closely following.
"If what she says is true, Chakenapok should be here," she said. "Though I don't know about his spirit. But the world he seems to have created for himself seems to mimic where he might really be. A cold lonely cave."
"But you said he's always surrounded by fire," Thomas reminded her.
Charmian glanced back at him. "Imagine you were stuck in your own personal hell and you had to come up with something to fend off the monsters," she said. "What would you do if you were always freezing and in the dark?"
Thomas's brow furrowed slightly as he seemed to realize what she was saying. "I think I get your point," he murmured, and rubbed one arm as if cold. "Funny, you make me feel almost sorry for the poor bloke."
"If Malsum weren't controlling him, he'd deserve that sympathy," Charmian returned, and started brushing and scooping snow away from the cave mouth. Thomas bent forward to assist. "The way I see it, if I can get close to his body, then maybe I can get close to him--or at least have a better idea of where to look. Even the Spirit Road wasn't certain where he'd be..."
She swept a mass of snow out of the way, and stuck her head in the cave. She had started to crawl in, Thomas behind her, when she noticed something glittering and jerked away from it with a gasp. She bumped into Thomas and put her hand up in the air--"Fire!"--and an orange glow filled the cave. Charmian and Moon Wolf stared at each other like two startled animals meeting in the woods.
After an awkward moment Charmian's scowl returned, and she turned away from him to peer into the furthest corner of the cave. She clambered in on hand and knees, keeping her one hand aloft to keep the place lit brightly enough to see; Thomas squeezed in behind her, noticing Moon Wolf as well, then turning to look at her.
"What are you looking for, exactly?"
"Any sign that he's still here, or still in control," Charmian said. She had to crouch almost flat to the ground to creep her hand into the far corner, the ceiling was so low. Thomas continued glancing at Moon Wolf as she did so. "If he is, then I have to find a way to reach him from here. If not, then I have to start over from square one."
"There aren't exactly many places to hide something in here," Thomas said, ducking his head to avoid hitting the rock.
"Kind of what I was thinking, but a baby isn't a very big thing to hide, is it?"
Moon Wolf's brow furrowed in confusion.
"Not much bigger than a breadbasket, I suppose," Thomas admitted. "Well, would she have set it down, or covered it with rocks, or actually buried it--?" He shivered. "Pardon if I say that I find this all rather morbid. An old lady burying a baby in a cave isn't exactly an image I relish."
"Digging him up isn't exactly something I relish," Charmian said, straining and stretching her arm.
Moon Wolf leaned forward. "You're seeking the small skeleton? If so, it's further down than you can reach."
Thomas looked back at him. A moment later Charmian withdrew her hand and did the same.
"Not meaning to be rude," Thomas said, "but that looks to be about as far as the thing goes."
Moon Wolf shook his head. "He means when it was enchanted," Charmian said, pushing herself up from the cave floor. "The last time I was here. It was a lot deeper--there was a sort of chasm or drop back here, and a cavern way down in the ground."
Thomas frowned. "'Chasm'?" He looked back at where the cave ceiling met its floor, uncertain.
"When I first came to stay here," Moon Wolf said, "years ago. I cleaned out the leaves and the rocks and found it in the very back."
"A baby skeleton?" Charmian said, turning herself around to crouch beside Thomas.
Moon Wolf nodded again. "Someone had placed it beneath rocks and left it there. I had no way of knowing who it belonged to. All I know is that as soon as I tried to move it, this was when the cave first showed itself."
Thomas seemed even more confused. "Showed...?"
"Opened up," Charmian said, feeling a twinge of impatience at his ignorance. "Keep going."
"I thought if I moved it too far, something bad might happen," Moon Wolf said. He paused, then added, "And it felt like a sign almost when the cave opened up. I thought if I moved it too far, it would disappear. So I took it down under the ground and buried it there. I sat watch beside it, but it had been here so long that I do not think what I did made any difference."
"You had reason to think it didn't make it over the Spirit Road?" Charmian asked.
Moon Wolf glanced at the back of the cave. "Children have much more trouble making this journey. And the way it was buried made me think it had not been properly mourned. There was no food, no belongings. Only a pile of rocks."
"This is Chakenapok's resting place, then," Charmian murmured. When Moon Wolf looked at her she spoke up. "He's the one who opened the cave--just like you thought. He would've made it over the Spirit Road, except his body was moved from its first grave to here. Some part of him still lived here all the time that you did. It's probably how he knew about you, and knew who you were once you died."
Moon Wolf's brow furrowed again. "He was here, with me...?" he said, and his gaze drifted toward the back of the cave again.
"Watching every single trick you taught me," Charmian said. "It was how he knew how to control you. He was already dead, so when you passed over, that was how he found you and kept you from the Spirit Road."
"I had thought..." Moon Wolf continued staring at the far edge of the cave, seeming troubled. "I had thought there was a manitou here...some sort of spirit of the cave. This was why I came. I thought I might learn from it."
"There was a spirit here, all right, but not that kind," Charmian said, and turned back to Thomas.
"Well, if he's down there," Thomas said in response to her look, "then I think we'd have a little trouble digging him out, wouldn't we?"
"We know he's here," Charmian said, "which is more than what we had before. So this is where it all begins. If I want to try a vision again, I should try it through here."
"Vision?" Moon Wolf's head snapped up and his eyes fixed on hers.
Charmian had to fight not to scowl at him. "Yeah, vision. At the Spirit Road. Wabasso and Stick-In-The-Dirt helped me with it. I kind of figured you wouldn't be much help, since you're so busy with yourself and everything."
Moon Wolf ignored her comment, instead leaning forward so abruptly that she would have jumped back, had the cave not been so small. "You went to the Spirit Road?" he exclaimed. "Do you have any idea how foolish this is--? If you had fallen from the Road, or gotten trapped, you might have never come back!"
Charmian let her scowl shine through. "I said a vision, not that I really WENT there! I was perfectly safe! It was nothing I couldn't handle without you."
Moon Wolf clenched his fists. "If this creature captured me at the Spirit Road--what makes you think you would be so safe?"
Even as she recognized the truth of what he said, she felt her anger overcoming her and clenched her own fists. "Maybe that says a lot more about YOU than about ME!" she snapped, and turned toward the cave entrance. Thomas watched after her with a perplexed look; he glanced briefly at Moon Wolf, then scrabbled to follow her as she crawled out into the snow.
"Charmian--!" He nearly fell on his face, and had to swipe his hands at the snow in order to regain his balance. "CHARMIAN!" he yelled, and grabbed hold of her wrist as she started on her way out of the clearing; she staggered to the side and he pulled on her arm to right her, then turned her around to face him. She wriggled out of his grasp but he caught hold of her again and ducked his head to meet her eyes.
"Charm! What is this all about? Every time the two of you are within a foot of each other, you seem fit to tear his throat out!"
"Good!" Charmian retorted. "No big loss!"
Thomas opened his mouth and left it that way, shaking his head and giving her a look which told her that he must think she was nuts. "This," he said, waving at the cave, "for the person who you say taught you? All that fuss you made after he tried to attack you, and then when he came back--? Now all of a sudden you want him dead?" When she tried pulling away again he grasped her tighter. "Something happened back through the Sky Tree, didn't it--? Up on the cliff! I left you with him, and when I came back you looked ready to bite everyone's head off!" He met her eyes again, though she tried hard not to look directly at him. "What happened up there, Charmian? Did he do something to you--?"
Charmian ground her teeth and tears sprang to her eyes. "Not to me!" she shouted. "To Shadow Water!" As soon as he looked confused again she wrenched her arm free and whirled away from him, stalking back into the woods. He paused only momentarily before following.
"Shadow Water--?" he panted as he caught up. "Isn't that one of the natives--?"
"She lives with Ocryx in Devil's Lake!" Charmian snapped, wiping at her eyes. "But the last time I was here she was working for Ocryana--she's her daughter! Ocryana treated her like shit!"
"But what's this have to do with--"
"HE'S HER FATHER!" Charmian yelled, making him stumble. "He wanted to be a great medicine man and so he SOLD her to Ocryana to get his powers! And he never did a THING about it! He didn't give a DAMN about her!"
Thomas lengthened his strides to catch up with her again. "That's what this is about--?" he cried, looking down at her and swiping a snow-laden branch out of the way. "When did this all happen--?"
"YEARS ago," Charmian muttered, rubbing her eyes again. "He says he didn't even know about her until after she was born--but even if that's so he could've gone after her!"
"But this Shadow Water person is fine now, right?" Thomas asked. "She's not still slaving for Ocryana, right--?"
"Of COURSE not," Charmian snapped. "She's completely different now! No thanks to HIM! If I hadn't taken care of Ocryana she would probably be dead by now!"
"But you did," Thomas insisted, "so she isn't. So why is this still getting to you--why is this the one thing you can't forgive?"
Charmian halted in her steps. "I saw her," she hissed under her breath, after a pause. She turned to look at Thomas and her eyes were wet. "I saw her face. I saw everything Ocryana did to her. She almost killed me--because Ocryana told her to. All that she was back then was because of him. Even Ocryana I can forgive, because she's crazy. But Moon Wolf knew exactly what he was doing and he did it anyway. And he never tried to set it right!"
Thomas frowned. "But he trained you to fight Ocryana."
Charmian flung up her hands. "So? That's what pisses me off the MOST! He's here training ME to fight her, while HE could've been off helping Shadow Water! He cared more about making himself look good than about helping his own daughter!"
"As if you really believe that?" Thomas retorted. "I know you better! I can tell from the way you talked about him that you don't think of him that poorly." He stepped in front of her and ducked to look into her face. "He trained you to fight off Ocryana," he said. "Doesn't that kind of tell you where his heart was the whole time--?"
Charmian scowled bitterly, hating how the tears streamed from her eyes. "Yeah! In his HEAD! Train me to save the Island, and HE gets to take the credit! Thinking of himself--just like before!"
Thomas's mouth twitched. "And what makes you think he didn't have something else in mind? Defeat Ocryana, and what else did you do--?"
"Saved the Island!" Charmian snapped.
Thomas cocked his head. "And what else did you save--?"
Charmian opened her mouth, then sucked in a breath. She let it out again almost immediately, and her stare wandered to the side, brow furrowing in confusion.
"I..." Her voice came soft and uncertain now. "You mean..." Her stare drifted down toward the ground. "He...didn't train me to save the Island...he..."
He trained me...to save Shadow Water!
That's what this was about--? All that training--everything he taught me? He knew I would fight Ocryana--he knew what I came here to do. He knew I would try to save the Island. But...that wasn't what he was really after...
When he fought her he said he was going to "atone"...he wasn't talking about the Island then...he was talking about something smaller...but more important to him...
He knew I would fight Ocryana no matter what he did! So he made sure I would win--and Shadow Water would go free! He did all of this for her...?
"He trained me to save Shadow Water," she murmured in a small voice, staring at the snow. Thomas let go of her arm and stayed standing in front of her. The feeling that crept over her now was indescribable; it felt as if her heart wanted to slide down into her ankles, and she wouldn't have minded a boughful of snow falling atop her, just to make her disappear completely.
Everything he does, everything he's been doing, he's been doing for Shadow Water. He even wanted me to tell her--his necklace. I forgot to. Why didn't he just tell me that, then...? Everything I said to him...
She cringed, biting her lip. All of the words she'd tossed out at him--You're just as bad as Ocryana!--echoed sharply in her head, and she'd never wished more in her life that she could take something back.
She managed to lift her head, just slightly, feeling the heat rising in her face. She peered up at Thomas to see that he was still looking at her; she averted her eyes again and fiddled her fingers.
"I..."
Thomas continued looking at her for a moment, then took a step to the side. Charmian saw Cave of the Woods set back in its clearing, nearly invisible through the trees; she flushed and lowered her head, taking a breath and letting it out. She started stepping meekly toward the cave.
She almost jumped when Thomas touched her arm as she passed him. "I think he already knows," he said quietly. "But it can't hurt for you to tell him so."
Suddenly, it was very difficult to swallow. Charmian managed to do so anyway, although with a lot of effort, and left Thomas behind in the snow, heading back for Cave of the Woods.
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